Saturday, March 02, 2013

6 ways to entertain yourself at 34003 ft

I'm at 34003 feet, high above the ground, soaring through the clouds just below the tip of Greenland. Well, I won't be when I post this, because funnily enough, the fluffy white clouds outside don't emit wifi (like some clouds do.)

I'm heading for Houston, which means that yes, I am on a 9 hour 16 minute flight. I've already watched Lincoln (was it just me that didn't know he got assassinated???) and I'm just a little bit bored.

So to solve all of your problems when you are in a similar situation - 5 hours 55 minutes left, wifi-less and trapped in a small metal blob that's higher than you can jump - I'm giving you a six-point-(partially serious) guide to survive.

Entertainment Idea #1
Write loads of random things. Bring a notebook, or I use the notes app on my iPod, and I'm sitting here blogging. Great waste of time! But I write clothes lists and design ideas and stories and bucket lists and post ideas and hit lists. Just kidding about that last one! You get the idea. A notebook and pen brings you endless freedom of expression! A great idea that my friend Camilla Fabbri over at was to use it as a medium for conversation - she and her daughter spoke not a word on a plane journey - but wrote it all down! Unique or what!?

Entertainment Idea #2
Plan your trip. If you're on a plane, it's quite likely you're going somewhere (duh!) and a few hours in limbo is the right time to look up different places, write down trip ideas etc. This can be kind of tricky without Internet so guidebooks are good.

Entertainment Idea #3
Sleep. Just kidding! I can't sleep on planes, nor in cars or on trains, and I don't expect anybody else to. Sleep isn't the most interesting activity either, is it?
A book, iPod/MP3/Sound thing and a bag of food are truly the essentials.

Speaking of food, I have a Starbucks falafel tray in my bag! I totally forgot! Designed to replace the food served which is, lets face it, freeze dried and designed for survival not pleasure.
I consider eating that food a skill that requires a very high pain threshold!

Entertainment Idea #4
Here would be a good place to insert 'paint nails awesomely.'
In hindsight, have you ever tried painting your nails in a shut room? If you have you'll know that the fumes are instant and strong. My mom is always coming into my room and being like 'are you trying to gas yourself???'
So I think, stick to paint-free nails so that you don't gas out the plane, have everyone hate you and you and your nail varnish end up on a 34002 foot drop back to earth!

*giant bare foot appears next to elbow*
*stares at foot until it disappears*
That was weird. Sorry 'bout that!

Back to...
Entertainment Idea #5
Knit. I think, think, that you are allowed knitting needles in the air. Bring a few balls of wool and enjoy! Personally, the thicker the wool the better - I just don't have the patience for fine knitting. It also shows up all of my (many) mistakes. Chunky knit is a little less granny ish, more forgiving and goes quicker. And if your needles get confiscated by customs, it's much better for finger knitting!

Entertainment Idea #6
Irritate other people. Have a contest with you sibling or friend to see how many times you can find useless reasons to call the air stewards, balance things on the person in front's head or see how long you can stand on your chair for before you get told off! And remember - NOTHING to do with me!

So that filled exactly an hour - only 4 hours 55 minutes left!

Wish me luck catching my connection to Miami (our flight was delayed by 45 minutes) and I might be a little absent for a week or so.

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